Sunday, September 20, 2009

Golden Calf

I feel like such an Isrealite right now! I'm right there among them as Moses went up the mountain with God and handing over my gold to build the calf.

 1 When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the mountain, they gathered around Aaron and said, "Come, make us gods [a] who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don't know what has happened to him.

Its so frustrating!!!!!!! This never ending battle with food truly stinks. This week for whatever reason, I have felt so unsatisfied. Nothing seemed like what I really wanted to eat. I have been short tempered. I have gotten angry for no reason. I have turned to food time and time again. I don't want to keep ending up back here, but I feel like I have to. I want to understand obesity from the inside out. I want to understand how the sin keeps drawing me back in. I want to learn it and know it so that I can fight it and finally win the WAR!

I am so thankful that Jesus has paid for my sins and that there are no Levites to come into my camp and kill me or be struck by a plague. I desire to get this right. I'm praying that God will continue to work in my heart and mind. That He will equip me to be able to truly present myself as a living sacrifice. I have had some good moments these past few weeks, and I am so thankful that God has given me the strength to do just that.

I have been getting on my grandmother's schwinn stationary bicycle (age uknown—25 or 30 years) and peddling away when I really wanted to sit around and do nothing. I have been working out twice a week with a trainer thanks to an amazing friend! I have been eating more fruits and vegetables over all, and drinking less and less carbonated beverages. I need to get to a place where I can win enough battles that tips me over to winning the war!

No comments: