It truly is so hard to change! This past week and a half has been challenging. I did pretty good last week. There were a few days when foodwise I could have done tons better. This week food has pretty much stunk for me. It is hard to explain to people who don't know anything about addictions. Something welled up inside of me this week and I felt compelled to eat. I don't know if I didn't eat the right kinds of foods or what but it has just been down right horrible at times. Ihave even questioned myself as to why I'm trying to change and can I truly change!
I have been reading this book about Moses taking the slaves out Egypt and have just gotten to when Joshua finally has the go ahead after they wander for 40 years. It is a fictional book recounted by a demon who was one of the original angels that fell with Lucifer. Its interesting to take into account how satan places the right demons to whisper the right doubts into the Isrealites heads at the right time. I am amazed how it was so easy for God's people to say it would be better to go back to Egypt because even if they were slaves, they knew what to expect day in and day out. That life of bondage was comfortable and it might not have been worth living but it was THEIR LIFE. It was all they had ever known.
So when satan's demons put that doubt into their ear, it wasn't hard for them to want to go back. We know how the story ends, but they didn't. They didn't know all the goodness that God had waiting for them. If they did, they wouldn't have waited in the desert for 40 years due to their disbelief and disobedience! So, I've been mulling around in my head this strange war that we live in where just on the other side of the river God has such great things, but unbeknown to us demons are right there trying to get us to go back to what we have known. My friends, we must find the courage to resist what has been enslaving us! We must trust in God to lead us into the promised land. For me that is a land of good health with healthy eating habits!