April update

The other day I caught of glimpse of her. It’s been quite some time since I had seen her. She looked confident. She had that smile that everyone always talks about. She seemed calm and at peace. She seemed full of love. She seemed happy. She looked like she knew where she was going in life and if she didn’t know she seemed ok with that.

I saw me-Amalie, Ames. Someone that I had forgotten about. I haven’t felt quite like myself since my dad died. I was struggling before he passed away, but losing him was a quite a blow that sent me into a world that I had forgotten had existed. These past almost 2 years have been the toughest of my life.

Where I am today is almost unfathomable. I never thought that I could make it through PA school. It was just too hard when I got here. Now, I’m six weeks away from starting my rotations. That is scary in itself, but it seems exciting at the same time. Since August I have done quite a battle with my inner self. The battle isn’t over but right now it seems that I am coming back to me. I’m beginning to feel comfortable with being me. I’m beginning to feel comfortable loving on others, sharing God’s love with others. I’m so thankful for this feeling. I pray that I will cling to these feelings in the heat of the battle.

This week I had the priveledge of one of my professors sharing with us in a student lead bible study with some of classmates. She talked about peace. She said that as one of the fruits of the spirit it is a gift to us. It has been given to us and we have to remember in times of hardship to take out peace and use it. I’m praying that I will continue to use peace as God has given it to me. I also had the revelation that Christ has already died for this problem that I have with food. He already paid the price for me. He has overcome my sin for me and with His love, His strength, and His guidance, I can overcome this!!