Well, my dream of working at St. Judes has been flattened and officially squashed! For those of you who don't know, my last rotation for PA school was to be at St. Judes Children Hospital in Pediatric Oncology. When I was 8 years old I told my mom that someday I would work there. So the fact that I was actually going to spend 4 weeks there on rotation was SUPER COOL!
We had memorial day off. I had been in communication with my contact there many, many times over the past few months. I was told all my paper work was in. So, I started Tuesday and followed around a Nurse practitioner in the Leukemia/Lymphoma clinic. She rocks...she was doing Lumbar punctures and Bone Marrow Aspirates the whole day. I had no idea mid levels could do those with out a physician watching you. It seriously impressed me. So, at the end of the day, I met up with my contact to go and get my ID badge.
This is where my dream began to flatten. We turned in my paper work and they said I had to go through employee health. My contact had no idea. She had just had 2 students the month before and had not had to do that. So, emails were sent to important people. Hence, it was found out at that point that I had some paper work missing. I still don't know what the initial missing paper work was. So, I was told to come Wednesday and go to the library at St. Judes and watch online lectures.
I did that. I finished my day and then went to study. About 6 last night, I checked my email to find my contact just found out that I didn't have a background check on file and did I have one. NOPE, I sure don't. Well, it takes at least ONE WEEK to get those things back. For me that means at least a week and a half of not seeing patients. Normally, I would love that, but in this case, it could be even longer than that to get the background check done. Dream of being at St. Judes—SQUASHED!
As soon as I found out, I called my wonderful clinical coordinator who said she would get to work on it first thing tomorrow. I then emailed her assistant(not sure of her real title) to let her know what was going on, because her assistant is the person that makes things happen. As of 10 am central time, this morning they already have a lead on my placement so I can start there on Monday. Keep praying that everything will go smoothly! My main focus is to spend these last weeks in school learning as much about pediatrics as possible. I know God is in control and HE is going to get me through this. Pray for safe travels to wherever I am heading. Pray for smooth transition into a possibly new clinic. Praise Him for the 2 days I spent at St. Judes which is truly an amazing place!
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Thursday, January 8, 2009
OVERWHELMED!!
Well, it has been quite an interesting past 6 months. I started out in July on my rotational year in Internal Medicine living in London, KY. From there I lived in Williamsburg, KY and worked in Jellico, TN on my Geriatric rotation. Then I lived in Lancaster, KY and worked in Stanford, KY for my Family medicine rotation. Finally, before Christmas I was in Albany, KY for my surgery rotation. This week I just started rotations again and am in Hazard, KY in psychiatry. I haven't spotted the General Lee yet, but will let you guys now if I have.
This has been some of the most overwhelming times of my life. I do not recommend you younger readers waiting until you are in your late 20s to move away from home for the first time. Then to make matters worse, you move to a new place every 4 weeks or so. Moving to new places has been a lot more stressful than I thought it would. It has led me to an overwhelmed feeling!
I mean on top of having to learn how to put all my classroom work to practice and being nervous about trying not to kill anyone, I have to pack up my life and move to a new town. Many of you know that I do not handle change well. I have dealt with anxiety most of my life. It frustrates me to know end that I get nervous about little things like going to hang out with old friends that I haven't seen in a while much less going to a place where I know no one. Most of the time I make myself do the things that I fear the most because I know I will survive. And that is just how it has been for me during all my moving around. God has provided for me everywhere I have been.
I wish that I had better balance in my life. That when one area gets out of whack the rest wouldn't go to pot, but it has. I have gained about 20 pounds back which is quite disheartening!! Have no fear though because I haven't given up yet. I have been getting caught in the fact that for about 3 months I just had a microwave to cook meals with and couldn't figure out "healthy" things OR that I didn't really have to the time or energy to think about eating right. Well that needs to stop:) I came to a point where I remembered something that I have known all along. IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO PUT THE WEIGHT ON AND IT MAY TAKE A LONG TIME TO LOSE IT. That being said, I started thinking about what little change I could make that over a LONG period of time would possibly help me lose weight.
Here is what I came up with: 1. Drink at least 40 oz of water a day. (Yes, I know they recommend 64 oz, but when a doctor dictates when you get to pee, one must limit there water intake) 2. Eat a healthy breakfast everyday.
I can do those 2 things for the next month. I can control that even amongst feeling so overwhelmed with everything else I have going on. More importantly, I'm going to have to keep thinking of ways to balance things in my life. THIS is real life. My life doesn't get to slow down just because I have this huge desire to lose weight. I mean it should, but its just not that way. So for now, I'm taking baby steps. I mean after all you have to crawl before you can walk!!
This has been some of the most overwhelming times of my life. I do not recommend you younger readers waiting until you are in your late 20s to move away from home for the first time. Then to make matters worse, you move to a new place every 4 weeks or so. Moving to new places has been a lot more stressful than I thought it would. It has led me to an overwhelmed feeling!
I mean on top of having to learn how to put all my classroom work to practice and being nervous about trying not to kill anyone, I have to pack up my life and move to a new town. Many of you know that I do not handle change well. I have dealt with anxiety most of my life. It frustrates me to know end that I get nervous about little things like going to hang out with old friends that I haven't seen in a while much less going to a place where I know no one. Most of the time I make myself do the things that I fear the most because I know I will survive. And that is just how it has been for me during all my moving around. God has provided for me everywhere I have been.
I wish that I had better balance in my life. That when one area gets out of whack the rest wouldn't go to pot, but it has. I have gained about 20 pounds back which is quite disheartening!! Have no fear though because I haven't given up yet. I have been getting caught in the fact that for about 3 months I just had a microwave to cook meals with and couldn't figure out "healthy" things OR that I didn't really have to the time or energy to think about eating right. Well that needs to stop:) I came to a point where I remembered something that I have known all along. IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO PUT THE WEIGHT ON AND IT MAY TAKE A LONG TIME TO LOSE IT. That being said, I started thinking about what little change I could make that over a LONG period of time would possibly help me lose weight.
Here is what I came up with: 1. Drink at least 40 oz of water a day. (Yes, I know they recommend 64 oz, but when a doctor dictates when you get to pee, one must limit there water intake) 2. Eat a healthy breakfast everyday.
I can do those 2 things for the next month. I can control that even amongst feeling so overwhelmed with everything else I have going on. More importantly, I'm going to have to keep thinking of ways to balance things in my life. THIS is real life. My life doesn't get to slow down just because I have this huge desire to lose weight. I mean it should, but its just not that way. So for now, I'm taking baby steps. I mean after all you have to crawl before you can walk!!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Medical Missions Conference
I went to the Global Missions Health Conference in Louisville, KY this past Thursday through Saturday. It is the second time that I have been. As a future health care professional, the opportunities and possibilities that have been presented to me are truly amazing. Last year, I walked into the bottom floor of the exhibit hall to see the different organizations that were set up. Notice I said the bottom floor; there were 2 floors full of exhibitors (I’m guessing 200+ booths). For those of you that live in the southern Baptist world, you can understand that I was shocked to know that there were so many choices out there to serve God that weren’t the IMB. I would also guess that there were at least a thousand people from all over the world who had come to gather and rejoice and learn about missions and being health care providers. It was amazing!
God really encouraged my heart this weekend. As I went to the different sessions and heard people speak, I kept thinking about the passion of the people that I was listening too. One man started a clinic in Memphis, TN out of his residency and in the past decade has actually moved into the inner city to become a part of his community that he serves. I had the privilege of hearing Steve Saint (son of a missionary killed in End of the Spear) speak about his life as a boy, his mission now, and other amazing things. I also was completely blown away by our last speaker who was a very humble 92 year old physician who had dedicated his entire life to serving and furthering Jesus Christ. Each speaker was so passionate about the wonderful things God had done in their lives. It was evident that they weren't saying look at me, look at what I have done with God's help. The love that they had for Christ oozed out through their stories. The wonderful things that happened to them seemed to be byproducts of their love for Christ. And that is the challenge that I was given; I was shown that I should seek to love God with my whole heart. It really isn’t about the work they are doing or what they are getting accomplished, but rather loving God. Each of the speakers that I heard seemed to have accomplished so much out of simply loving Christ. From what I saw none of them were trying to reach X number of people or treat X number of patients, but they were seeking Christ daily and as a result were then reaching and treating people.
For me I sometimes get caught up in “all that needs to be done.” I keep asking Christ what it is that he wants me to do. When I graduate, I want to be put in the “right” practice or at the “right” ministry to begin serving him. I don’t want to miss THE boat that God wants me to get on. Well, I think somewhere along the way I forgot, “love the Lord your God with all your soul and all your might.” THE boat that I should be on is the one that has been set in the direction of loving God.
Honestly, I know I haven’t been doing my part. I am not seeking Christ in everything that I do. In fact, right now in PA school, I am solely concentrating on learning medicine. I have felt so overwhelmed in all that is required of becoming knowledgeable in treating patients that I have made it ok for myself not to go to church and not to spend time in the word. I say to myself, “God called me to PA school. For his glory I need to study and do the best that I can do. So that when I am finished I can be a great PA for Him. He will understand if I don’t make it to church on Sunday because I am exhausted from studying and want to sleep in a little and then study some more.”
Man, I have been foolish. Yes, I do believe that to whom much is given, much is required, but not at the sake of falling out of fellowship with Christ. The challenge that I found Christ gently whispering to me this weekend was that I need to get back to Him and everything else will fall into place. I have felt challenged to do this: Each day when I come home from work and get ready to study, I am going to pull out my bible first and spend no less than 15 minutes with Him. I know that you may be saying 15 minutes isn’t a lot, but I truly haven’t even spent one minute in His word in quite some time. I think I will be surprised at how much time I actually spend with Him, and I’m pretty sure my learning will more than likely be blessed by it!
My challenge to you would be to take a minute and evaluate all the “things” that you are doing for Christ. Why are you doing these things? Is it because you feel obligated? Is it because it is the “right” thing to do? Is it out of the obligation of a call you feel was placed in your life? Is it because it makes you look good while saying it is all for God’s glory? If you aren’t doing it as an overspilling of seeking to love Christ with your whole heart, you may need to make some adjustments in your life and your heart. I challenge you to love God first; take as long as you need and see what happens and where it leads you.
God really encouraged my heart this weekend. As I went to the different sessions and heard people speak, I kept thinking about the passion of the people that I was listening too. One man started a clinic in Memphis, TN out of his residency and in the past decade has actually moved into the inner city to become a part of his community that he serves. I had the privilege of hearing Steve Saint (son of a missionary killed in End of the Spear) speak about his life as a boy, his mission now, and other amazing things. I also was completely blown away by our last speaker who was a very humble 92 year old physician who had dedicated his entire life to serving and furthering Jesus Christ. Each speaker was so passionate about the wonderful things God had done in their lives. It was evident that they weren't saying look at me, look at what I have done with God's help. The love that they had for Christ oozed out through their stories. The wonderful things that happened to them seemed to be byproducts of their love for Christ. And that is the challenge that I was given; I was shown that I should seek to love God with my whole heart. It really isn’t about the work they are doing or what they are getting accomplished, but rather loving God. Each of the speakers that I heard seemed to have accomplished so much out of simply loving Christ. From what I saw none of them were trying to reach X number of people or treat X number of patients, but they were seeking Christ daily and as a result were then reaching and treating people.
For me I sometimes get caught up in “all that needs to be done.” I keep asking Christ what it is that he wants me to do. When I graduate, I want to be put in the “right” practice or at the “right” ministry to begin serving him. I don’t want to miss THE boat that God wants me to get on. Well, I think somewhere along the way I forgot, “love the Lord your God with all your soul and all your might.” THE boat that I should be on is the one that has been set in the direction of loving God.
Honestly, I know I haven’t been doing my part. I am not seeking Christ in everything that I do. In fact, right now in PA school, I am solely concentrating on learning medicine. I have felt so overwhelmed in all that is required of becoming knowledgeable in treating patients that I have made it ok for myself not to go to church and not to spend time in the word. I say to myself, “God called me to PA school. For his glory I need to study and do the best that I can do. So that when I am finished I can be a great PA for Him. He will understand if I don’t make it to church on Sunday because I am exhausted from studying and want to sleep in a little and then study some more.”
Man, I have been foolish. Yes, I do believe that to whom much is given, much is required, but not at the sake of falling out of fellowship with Christ. The challenge that I found Christ gently whispering to me this weekend was that I need to get back to Him and everything else will fall into place. I have felt challenged to do this: Each day when I come home from work and get ready to study, I am going to pull out my bible first and spend no less than 15 minutes with Him. I know that you may be saying 15 minutes isn’t a lot, but I truly haven’t even spent one minute in His word in quite some time. I think I will be surprised at how much time I actually spend with Him, and I’m pretty sure my learning will more than likely be blessed by it!
My challenge to you would be to take a minute and evaluate all the “things” that you are doing for Christ. Why are you doing these things? Is it because you feel obligated? Is it because it is the “right” thing to do? Is it out of the obligation of a call you feel was placed in your life? Is it because it makes you look good while saying it is all for God’s glory? If you aren’t doing it as an overspilling of seeking to love Christ with your whole heart, you may need to make some adjustments in your life and your heart. I challenge you to love God first; take as long as you need and see what happens and where it leads you.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
More thoughts on rotations
Well, since the "Poo" doctor things just haven't been as interesting. In fact things seemed to become very serious. After 2 weeks in GI I went to pulmonology for 2 weeks and then to cardiology for 4 weeks. You really do have to have a heart that works and lungs that function to live in this world. When those organs become diseased there just really isn't anything too funny about them. I did have a great time in London, KY working with the doctors there and learning alot.
One of the lung doctors stressed me out at times because of how hyper he was. I absolutely loved working in cardiology. That doctor there was tough as I had to give oral presentations on certain disease processes to him. He would then question me on everything I had studied. Most of the time I felt dumb but I know that I learned a lot.
After living in London, KY for 2 months I moved to Williamsburg, KY and worked in Jellico, TN for my Geriatrics rotation. I was with an endocrinologist who mostly saw diabetic patients. I also went to the nursing home once a week as well. Geriatrics was pretty eye opening because I got to really observe how people age. To some extent I truly believe that we, the patients, have control over how we age. We can work hard in younger years to be fit and healthy which will help us to live better in older age. Sometimes, the way God made us over takes that and we can't help but have lots and lots of problems with aging. Probably the most encouraging thing was to see people past the age of 65 living their lives to the fullest no matter the physical health.
Currently, I am in Stanford, KY for the next 2 months in Family Medicine. I have already finished 2 weeks here. It is quite interesting because the doctor I got assigned to prays with his patients (if they allow him) at every visit. Also, most of the patients that we see are there for pain pills and nerve pills. These past 2 weeks have really showed me how people's needs are so much more than health needs. My heart has been broken over and over for our patients. I'm glad that I believe in Jesus because He truly is the only relief and healing that can help!
I know these thoughts are kind of rambled. For those of you who have done the grad school thing or even PA school you know that this is just par for the course in the rotation year. For the rest of you just take my word for it. This may very well be the hardest year that I have ever lived through mentally but I know by God's grace I can make!!
One of the lung doctors stressed me out at times because of how hyper he was. I absolutely loved working in cardiology. That doctor there was tough as I had to give oral presentations on certain disease processes to him. He would then question me on everything I had studied. Most of the time I felt dumb but I know that I learned a lot.
After living in London, KY for 2 months I moved to Williamsburg, KY and worked in Jellico, TN for my Geriatrics rotation. I was with an endocrinologist who mostly saw diabetic patients. I also went to the nursing home once a week as well. Geriatrics was pretty eye opening because I got to really observe how people age. To some extent I truly believe that we, the patients, have control over how we age. We can work hard in younger years to be fit and healthy which will help us to live better in older age. Sometimes, the way God made us over takes that and we can't help but have lots and lots of problems with aging. Probably the most encouraging thing was to see people past the age of 65 living their lives to the fullest no matter the physical health.
Currently, I am in Stanford, KY for the next 2 months in Family Medicine. I have already finished 2 weeks here. It is quite interesting because the doctor I got assigned to prays with his patients (if they allow him) at every visit. Also, most of the patients that we see are there for pain pills and nerve pills. These past 2 weeks have really showed me how people's needs are so much more than health needs. My heart has been broken over and over for our patients. I'm glad that I believe in Jesus because He truly is the only relief and healing that can help!
I know these thoughts are kind of rambled. For those of you who have done the grad school thing or even PA school you know that this is just par for the course in the rotation year. For the rest of you just take my word for it. This may very well be the hardest year that I have ever lived through mentally but I know by God's grace I can make!!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
2 weeks with a "poo" doctor
Well, I have finished my first 2 weeks of clinical rotations for PA school. I only have 48 more to go but who is counting! I am on my internal medicine rotation and somehow that has translated into me working with a GI doc these first 2 weeks; next I’m with lung docs for 2 weeks and then with heart docs for 4 weeks. I just wanted to share with you guys some things that I have learned over that past 2 weeks about the stomach. DISCLAIMER: Some of the below information may just be
The first day that I got to watch colonoscopy and EGDs being performed. I kept hearing this noise. I knew that at times they were using suction but it really sounded like farting. I didn't really think the patients were truly farting on the doctor until he said, "Gosh, Joe(true name withheld) You are blowing me away down there!" Boy did I feel stupid and disgusted all at the same time.
Doc asks me: “Do you know how many times on average a person passes gas a day?”
ME: “I have no idea.”
Doc: “13.5 times a day”
(Seriously, 13.5 times a day, that is a lot of farts and for those of you who say you don’t ever fart I think you have to be contributing somehow.)
Pt to doc:
“Doc, I’m just feeling “nawzee” all the time
Translation (which took me a second): “Doc, I’m just feeling nausea all the time”
style="font-family:Andy;">Doc asks me: “Worldwide what is the average number of bowel movements in day?”
Me: “I would say 3-4 times a day to once a week”
Doc: “Actually it is up to 8 times in one day if you live in
Me(thinking to myself): 8 times a day…are you kidding me and once in 2 weeks…how awful
Pt to doc: “I’m telling you it feels like I’m frying an egg down there”
Translation: really bad heart burn
Doc says to me: “Did you know if you took all the microvilli in your stomach and spread them out they would cover a football field?”
Me(thinking): “DANG”
Doc to patient: “you know if you quit smoking all your stomach problems would go away”
Patient was having nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, and reflux. She was in terrible pain. She didn’t understand what the smoking had to do with it. So the good doctor explains. NOT ONCE DID HE MENTION
When a patient comes in with constipation or diarrhea it is important to ask the following:
How much do you poo a day?
Is it a small amount or a large amount?
What color is it?
Does it stink? I mean does it stink way more than normal, like makes your eyes water?(word from the good doc)
So my advice to you who don’t look is you better start investigating because we as your health care providers do care!
Seriously, I think that was my favorite comment that I heard the past 2 weeks!!
All in all it was a great 2 weeks. I have seen more people’s butt cheeks than I ever want to see again. I have seen exactly what lives in your stomach and your colon. Trust me people it is not pretty. The doctor that I was working with was an awesome guy(aside from the smoking baby mama), and he taught me more about being available to patients. His biggest piece of advise to me was what one of his mentors called the 3 As: be “A”vailable, be “A”miable, and be “A”ble and in that order. I think I can handle that. I’m not sure if working with lung doctors is going to be as interesting as these past 2 weeks but I will update you all soon!
Thursday, June 26, 2008
new perspective
You know I have been very frustrated lately. I think that is becoming a theme for me in this weight loss journey. About a month ago, one week before I was to do my triathlon, I was rearended and got whiplash. I didn't exercise for a whole week or was allowed to do the triathlon. Not that being in the middle of finals is a great excuse, but that combined with the no exercise led to a 4 pound weight gain. Then I came home and went to the beach. My goal was to not gain weight and/or lose it. In my mind, I was going to lose weight. Well, I had a really good week at the beach. I had great breakfast and lunches, and ate what I wanted at dinner. I exercised 4 of the days that I was there. I came home and I had not lost ANY weight. I was so mad and so discouraged. I was begging God to just help get rid of this problem, to kick the habit of eating when I shouldn't, to eat better, to exercise more, etc, etc.
So, as my dorky PA student self, I sat down to watch a little discovery channel. I watched this show about people with what is called Proteus syndrome. People afflicted with this disease have a part of their body that will not quit growing. One particular person highlighted in the show had legs that weight about 150 pounds all on their own. The only way I can explain this is to think of the marshmallow man in ghostbusters and how big, well he was, but that is what her feet and legs looked like. She had to go to have her shoes specially fitted because they were constantly growing.
I just kept thinking about her once the show was over. She has this affliction that will never go away because there is no cure for Proteus syndrome. In fact if doctors perform surgery on their bones it somehow makes the bones grow more and at a faster rate. I couldn't shake how positive this woman was and how she just went about her own life with what at times was evident pain. I felt horrible for the way I was feeling about my struggle with weight loss. I do have some control over my weight. I have a lot of control. God never promised us an easy life. He did say that "He knows the plans he has for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us."
I have to cling to that hope. We all have to cling to that truth. We need to remember that everyone has their own burdens. Realize that maybe your burdens truly aren't that bad. Take some time to look at other people, like this women with proteus, and see that there situation really is bad and see the AWESOME ways that they triumph. I say follow in their footsteps. Never think that your situation is not important. I think that all of us in the midst of our pain should remember that we are valid. A struggle with sin is just that and sometimes it can be overwhelming. Thank God for the struggle, but allow Him to help you stand up under it. Allow him to free you from it.
So, as my dorky PA student self, I sat down to watch a little discovery channel. I watched this show about people with what is called Proteus syndrome. People afflicted with this disease have a part of their body that will not quit growing. One particular person highlighted in the show had legs that weight about 150 pounds all on their own. The only way I can explain this is to think of the marshmallow man in ghostbusters and how big, well he was, but that is what her feet and legs looked like. She had to go to have her shoes specially fitted because they were constantly growing.
I just kept thinking about her once the show was over. She has this affliction that will never go away because there is no cure for Proteus syndrome. In fact if doctors perform surgery on their bones it somehow makes the bones grow more and at a faster rate. I couldn't shake how positive this woman was and how she just went about her own life with what at times was evident pain. I felt horrible for the way I was feeling about my struggle with weight loss. I do have some control over my weight. I have a lot of control. God never promised us an easy life. He did say that "He knows the plans he has for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us."
I have to cling to that hope. We all have to cling to that truth. We need to remember that everyone has their own burdens. Realize that maybe your burdens truly aren't that bad. Take some time to look at other people, like this women with proteus, and see that there situation really is bad and see the AWESOME ways that they triumph. I say follow in their footsteps. Never think that your situation is not important. I think that all of us in the midst of our pain should remember that we are valid. A struggle with sin is just that and sometimes it can be overwhelming. Thank God for the struggle, but allow Him to help you stand up under it. Allow him to free you from it.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
jesus and the hemorrhagic woman
I have not posted on here in some time and just as a forewarning this is going to be a long post, but God has been teaching me a lot lately and I want to share with all of you. First, there is a song by Natalie Grant called Our Hope Endures, and in it there is a phrase that says: “walk a mile with a women whose body whose torn with illness but she marches on”. The song goes on to say: “our hope endures the worst of conditions, its more than our optimism; let the earth quake our hope is unchanged.” For whatever reason that song led me to the story of the hemorrhagic woman being healed. Natalie Grant gave me this picture of the her walking in the crowd that day with a purpose. She marches on, her hope endures and ultimately it led to her healing. I have read that passage in the NIV,
In the crowd that day there was a woman who for twelve years had been afflicted with hemorrhages. She had spent every penny she had on doctors but not one had been able to help her. She slipped in from behind and touched the edge of Jesus' robe. At that very moment her hemorrhaging stopped. Jesus said, "Who touched me?"
When no one stepped forward, Peter said, "But Master, we've got crowds of people on our hands. Dozens have touched you."
Jesus insisted, "Someone touched me. I felt power discharging from me."
When the woman realized that she couldn't remain hidden, she knelt trembling before him. In front of all the people, she blurted out her story—why she touched him and how at that same moment she was healed. Jesus said, "Daughter, you took a risk trusting me, and now you're healed and whole. Live well, live blessed!"
God had so much more to say to me besides that the woman’s hope never failed. Notice first here that it says she had this affliction for 12 years. Can you imagine bleeding for 12 years? I’ve heard people preach on this before and say that she was literally cut off from the church b/c she could not enter the temple to even be in the parts of it where women were accepted. Today, while we aren’t excluded from the church because of our sin, I have let my battle with food hold me back in so many ways in my spiritual life. It really is sad.
Second, it says that she had “spent every penny on doctors but none had been able to help her” How much of my resources—my money, my time, my thoughts—have I invested especially in the area of weight loss to find something/anything that will cure me of my weightloss problem and nothing has worked? How many of us have afflictions or sins that we have invested in everything we have to stop sinning, everything that is but Jesus?
Third, notice she slipped in from behind and just touched the hem of Jesus robe. She slipped in from behind. She didn’t want anyone to notice her. She wanted to keep her 12 year problem a secret but she wanted to be healed and she knew Jesus was the one who could do it. This women knew that she didn’t even need all of Jesus, just a little part of him. She knew that he was so powerful that just his hem of his robe had enough power to heal her. Oh us of little faith, just the smallest bit of Jesus is all we need. He is more than sufficient!
Fourth, when she was healed and Jesus felt that power had left him and he stopped and demanded to know who had touched him, she realized that she couldn’t remain hidden. This bleeding women who for 12 years had been trying everything to be healed so that she could be entered into the fellowship of God in the temple. This woman who probably had dodged so many questions as to why she wasn’t going to the temple, etc all because of her affliction, was now going to have to be noticed. In that moment she knelt before Christ and the WHOLE CROWD and here it says, “she blurted out her story—why she touched him and how at the same moment she was healed.” I think this is the part that really spoke to me. I have mentioned before how part of the weight gain was to keep me “hidden” from the world. I have maybe even tried to down play this weight loss. BUT, I see it clearly here that the “crowd” needs to know my struggle and they need to see how it all turns out. Christ deserves the credit and the glory and the honor of the work he is doing in me. I should be “blurting” my story out to all who will hear.
Last, Christ leaves us with this—“live well, live blessed” I intend to do just that. I am blessed because God has been doing so much in my life right now. I’m still at the halfway mark to my next 10% and while I may not make it to my goal by July 7. I do know that I have made so much progress in the last year!! Thank you all for your prayers. No matter what happens, I have lost 45 pounds since Labor day 2007J
There is just so much power in knowing that Jesus died for me, for all of me—I’m truly at a loss for words to express how I feel about this. I pray that each of you who read this will be encouraged to “blurt out” your own struggles so that Christ’s kingdom can be furthered!!
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